It's been some time..

 It's been MONTHS yah! It really did look like I was never going to write again. Well nope! I still have my blog on mind and I'm back!

Things are finally happening in my life so it's actually worth writing about and remember. After 2 years secluded in the middle of nature at my Mom's place in the South of France, I'm finally out of there and I decided to take to Denmark for some months, and maybe work here. I'm going to talk about that in my next post, but first I need to get the fantabalous Közi live report out of the way.

The day before the live I went to the first lolita meeting I've ever been to. It was quite unplanned and half assed, and I was greatly nervous. But in the end, it just so happened to be the first time in years, literally, that I felt at ease with some people, actually enjoyed myself (!!!) and didn't want to go home. It was so damn relaxed and I got along especially well with one of the girls, or so I felt. Too bad I wont see her before long. Booh.

Headed to Nôtre-Dame



Cheap girl only getting water..



Muriel's first time at Starbucks. Poor girl didn't know what she missed out on.



The day of the live, 10th of April 2011

Woke up early, in order to have my 3 hours of preparation. Now I'm always greatly dissapointed of how I look after a lot of painting and up-doing and tralala, but this day, I adored how I looked. Everything was nearly perfect. I ended up thinking my make-up made me look like a nice little grandma (that's a good thing in my mind). Then I realised I looked like this beautiful woman, whom I adore and always gush over when flipping through Ageha:

Airi Kisaki

That was a pretty good ego booster for the day. Unfortunately, no picture of the make-up.

This day was really busy and a LOT of fun for me, because I had a bunch of people to see. My usual crowd, the lolitas I met the day before, and some Scapers - Scarlet Penta and Alejandra. I was frolicking around between all the different people which was quite confusing, and I didn't want to come across as snobby, just leaving people to go see some others. But I think I managed pretty well!

Muriel, meh and Ben.

  During our camwhoring time, we could hear Közi band rehearsing. Grottesca and Crimson Star, which.. made Muriel cry. I understand that a song can mean a lot to someone but I'll never get the instant crying.

The charity concert was first and there were nearly NO ONE in the hall (which was too big, so the sound was crap. Like really, crap.). There were mostly rap stuff, the kind that doesn't really belong at a convention but hey, I was into it anyway! Then after what seemed like an eternity, Közi band, Miyu, Kenzo and Stefan from dead sexy inc came on stage For one song. That I didn't..recognize? With no sound, just noise. A big WTF ensued.

Before them coming on stage, we spotted them waiting at the side of the stage. At the moment I saw Charge, I knew I was going to be crazy about that guy for a looong time. And I was right. He's a wicked weird crazy ass drummer with skills. Mad skills. Love at first sight you might say.

 I think he was the one who were late and made the crew crazy. He leaned over the bars while looking at the act on stage, yawning like there were no tomorrow. All those who recognized him waved at him like crazy but he was spazing out. Until he realized and began smirking as hell and waving back.



First glimpse of Közi. We were freaking out.



Then after this.. weird representation, was the signing session. They came with the merchendizing a bit late, installed everything, and sat down for the session to begin. In the middle of everything in a very relaxed way. Sisen was playing the sales clerk her. Fun.

And what did they have at the merchandizing table?? They had baaadggggggessssssssssss! I've been dreaming of being in possesion of one of those for so long, and now I've got some! I got some pretty nice ones. But not the Közi logo unfortunately. Sad face.

I bought LOKIN ROLL for them to sign on, cause I din't bring anything for them to sign. Which saddens me to no end. Amazing things happened to those who had Közi stuff with them. I'm still feeling so unhealthily jealous about that.. hum, I need not to think about that episode really. Anyway, I made them sign on the little paper bag the badges were in because I didn't have time to unwrap the plastic on the cd. Sugiya and Miyu signed. Miyu gave out some flyers and stuff.

Then was Közi, who asked for my hand (I do like the way that sounds), as I realised I didn't shake Sugiya and Miyu's. Oops. His hands were really big, I was kind of surprised XD I remembered the tinyness of Mana's hands, which then just seemed even tinier than before.There I remembered my gifts for them and gave them. I bought high quality French terrine, pâte, you know, all that good shit. And some kick ass fresh bread that I went out of my way to go get before the live. I do wonder if they even took a bite. Probably not. Shrug!





I'm extremely dissapointed that I didn't say what I wanted to say. I'd been practizing what to say in Japanese for days, and I felt great and not nervous when I was standing if front of him but somehow.. I just forgot saying anything. All I said was " Oh I've got o-miyage for everyone to share, here please take!". Blah! Was that it? My big monologue just ended up being about food? wtf? Yeah so I was not very interesting, and I didn't have boobs to spare (thinking about a friend here haha.. he spazed out looking at her cleavage. What a guy. )

Later, when they left for the real live to begin, a friend pointed out Közi had my bag in his hand, which made me.. so happy. It's ridiculous but, I felt terribly happy.

I'm also dissapointed I didn't really get a good look at Közi's eyes, to speak properly. I could only see his fake eyelashes. A bush of fake eyelashes. Boy was he ugly that day, but oh was he sexy.

Then, after Közi, came Jiro. And that guy is a squishy sugar candy bear. He's always smiling that one, he's teribly huggable.

Then came Charge. Oh Charge. He was totally weird and he freaked me out while I just wanted to go hang with him at a bar (whereas I hate alcohol), and he just.. said something in a strange manner, and looking into his lensed eyes just made me even more confused so he ended up putting his hands forward in order for me to shake his hand. I don't know what the hell all the weird talking and gestures were about but I just wanted to tell him "dudem you're just fucking great". Which I could have, and was about to do. But I didn't. WHY? D:



Afterwards, me and the lolis just stood aside showing eachother our autograpgs and what we bought, giggling like litle school girls in the school yard. I love this picture:





I never ever want to loose this feeling of pure child-joy. Fangirling, however much it's unbearable when girls are unstable in their behavior, is a terribly nice feeling. And I want to be able to be a giggling little girl at the age of 70 still.



While waiting for the signing session to be over, and for the presumed photo session to begin (it wasn't sure, it all depended on the time) Charge was checking me out hard time. Which just made me go blank as I always do (seriously, it bosted my ego like woah once again, but I have problems with being checked out. It's creepy.). Then he turned to Jiro while looking at me, to say something about me. Then they both stared at me with those huuuge smiles on their face. I began laughing out loud and just shook my head at them.

I also began wondering if I had really said something terribly stupid when I was in front of them for them to look at me like they did(I did confuse Jiro and Sugiya's names at first, I remember) or if I just looked like a true rock'n'roll groupie ass in my get-up.

When the meet and greet was over, we did have time for a little photo session. And I got a fucking photo with my favourite musician and artist. Unbelievable stuff.

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This is really seriously the most beautiful photo I've ever been able to see thus far. And it probably will be for a long long time. I still can't keep my eyes from it. But I can't digest that Közi's face is next to mine, that we're on the same goddamn photo. I basically can't see him. Having Charge there always make me smile but Közi.. it's just too out there for my brain to understand that this is real.



I actually look ok on the photo, and that's a fucking surprise. I always imagined I'd end up looking terrible on a photo if I ever got to do a group shot with some band. Omg!

Aaaaand, concert. I didn't get to be in the front!? Here I was, promising myself, and having been in the front for the charity concert, and then I ended up being like, 3rd? Guh.

But I could see everything, and I had a blast but felt the people being too stoic once again. Seen from the back, that was apparently not the case.

The sound was baaaad, cause it was a huge hall, and the stage was just in a little ass corner. We could hear the guitars alright, but the singing.. didn't matter, we sang along anyway. Boy did we sing along.

I think it's pretty special when a band can manage to be good even when the sound is shit. And it was so good. 

They played. Incoherents, Cruel Arcadia, Crimson star (for the encore too, so 2 times, yeeha!), Honey vanity retromantics club mix, Babylo, something I didn't know, and others I don't remember.

(And Verdi's Dies Irae as intro~)

The concert finished, and there I were, having eaten nothing the whole day, but having gulped down a little bottle of menthol water. And I wasn't hungry, no sir, I was too excited to be hungry (and I still couldn't really eat the days afterward.)

Ben got backstage, which got me all the more excited except that I realized that he could have gotten me backstage too, but that's a no go for Ben, cause hey, he wouldn't have been able to brag in front of me if he let me pass. Gawd.

I greeted everyone goodbye, took my shoes off and went around shouting out loud that I had seen Közi and that I was already feeling the withdrawal of the concert. I felt doooown yo. I wanted more. But, well, it was over and I then went to eat (guh) with the old circle of friends that we used to be. It had been a looong time we hadn't seen each other together like that, and the evening turned out being really nice. We went eating near the Opera, all 8 of us, and we had a blast.

 Unfortunately, my expensive club sandwich I couldn't eat, so I got a doggy bag. And that was it. My day was nearly perfect, and I had a really hard time getting over it. Cause it was grand. And oh. And Közi. I mean. Oh.

The days after, I went into groupie style mode and just wanted black and glitter and 80's kitch.

I saw Közi, I heard him live, I shaked his hand, I got an autograph and I have an effing photo with him. GO, LIFE!